Scientists Ruin Halloween

Scientists have sucked the life out of the vampire myth:

Efthimiou’s debunking logic: On Jan 1, 1600, the human population was 536,870,911. If the first vampire came into existence that day and bit one person a month, there would have been two vampires by Feb. 1, 1600. A month later there would have been four, and so on. In just two-and-a-half years the original human population would all have become vampires with nobody left to feed on.

I wonder why this study came about: was it because these scientists truly had nothing to do or was it because of their own insecurities that cause them to utilize science to reaffirm their own safety, like a small child turning on the lights in the middle of the night in order to destroy the monsters under his bed?

Either way it’s perfectly obvious that Halloween is completely beyond these guys.

 

Bury Me a G

A decade ago today, Tupac Shakur died after a drive-by shooting in Las Vegas. Yet he has become immortalized through current remixes, desperate imitators, and college dorm posters. People continue to idolize Tupac because he was neither derivative nor uninspired; unlike today’s “hyphy” or “crunk” hip-hop movement, Tupac’s songs were intelligent and substantial. They don’t repeat moronic verses over and over, but rather convey a coherent and articulate message.

This is my favorite poem by Tupac:

When Your Hero Falls

When your hero falls from grace
All fairy tales are uncovered
Myths exposed and pain magnified
The greatest pain discovered
You taught me to be strong
But I’m confused to see you so weak
You said never to give up
And it hurts to see you welcome defeat

When your hero falls so do the stars
And so does the perception of tomorrow
Without my hero there is only
Me alone to deal with my sorrow
Your heart ceases to work
And your soul is not happy at all
What are you expected to do
When Your only hero falls?

Changes, perhaps his best known social statement, is both a sample a response to Bruce Hornsby’s The Way it is, a song about the 1960’s Civil Rights Movement. Hornsby’s song expresses the pain of segregation and the close-mindedness of racial policy. Tupac viewed his current world, amidst the racial and social complexity of South Central Los Angeles, and points out the covert segregation and hatred that still exists. His response is blunt: “I still see no changes”. Changes asks many questions: by acquiescing to the inherent wrongs of racism mentioned in The Way it is, are we currently condoning such actions because we find it convenient or rather because we simply are limited and cannot progress? Or is Tupac optimistically viewing a rather dismal situation and hoping for, well, changes?

I’d love to hear E-40’s take on the matter, but I’m afraid that the message would be lost amidst an unintelligible jumble of “hyphy”, “thizz”, and “giggin”. Today’s mainstream hip-hop has lost its luster, trading in it’s artistic edge for materialistic image. Too bad: if today’s artists took off their “stunna shades”, perhaps they’d see the potential their art form truly possess to both inform and inspire.

 

Remembering Steve Irwin–By Killing Stingrays

Stingrays, bane of the late “Crocodile Hunter” Steve Irwin, are being targeted by bitter Australians and vengeful supporters.

The report:

At least 10 stingrays have been killed since “Crocodile Hunter” Steve Irwin was fatally injured by one of the fish, an official said Tuesday, prompting a spokesman for the late TV star’s animal charity to urge people not take revenge on the animals.

Michael Hornby, the executive director of Irwin’s Wildlife Warriors conservation group, said he was concerned the rays were being hunted and killed in retaliation for Irwin’s death.

“It may be some sort of retribution, or it may be fear from certain individuals, or it just may be yet another callous act toward wildlife,” he said.

The hypocrisy from this is both glaringly obvious and somewhat humorous.  In a past post, I glibly warned against reprisal attacks against the perpetrator in the untimely death of the beloved Crocodile Hunter.  That’s because I didn’t think anyone would actually consider it. 

If there’s anything I’ve learned as a journalist, it’s this: always assume the worst from human beings.

Let’s think about this for a moment: people upset at the death of their beloved wildlife fanatic go out and fanatically kill wildlife.  Killing stingrays certainly won’t bring Irwin back, nor will it assuage the loss of a great human being.  To echo a Buddhist sentiment, it’ll only unnecessarily increase the suffering in an already chaotic universe.

If there is a heaven, I’ll bet Steve Irwin is there right now with his new pals Charles Darwin and Dian Fossey, taking a brief moment from riding raptors and wooly mammoths to shake his head in disapproval and disgust. 

 

Crikey! The Crocodile Hunter is Dead!

For those of you living in a barn, Steve Irwin, the obnoxious Australian conservationist known as the “Crocodile Hunter” was killed yesterday in the Great Barrier Reef by a sting ray. Read more here.

I don’t mean to be disrespectful at all with this post, but is anyone surprised by this? This guy has had so many close calls that his number was due to be called at any moment. His appeal was his brash recklessness, appealing to the audience but often a detriment to the performer. Remember a few years ago when he fed some hungry alligators with his infant son in one arm? Yes, disaster waiting to happen.

I suppose the irony of this situation is that his demise was ultimately brought on by a sting ray, a passive creature that simply stings upon instinct. According to University of Queensland marine neuroscientist Shaun Collin:

Stingrays have a serrated, toxin-loaded barb, or spine, on the top of their tail. The barb, which can be up to 10 inches long, flexes if a ray is frightened. Stings usually occur to people when they step on or swim too close to a ray and can be excruciatingly painful but are rarely fatal.

More about the culprit here.

Through all of this, I hope we can mourn the loss of a great entertainer and spare poor sting rays out there of our heated scorn. If anything, we can probably find solace in the fact that he died doing what he absolutely loved, something rare in this rat race day and age.